The teenage years are tough, no doubt. There is so much going on with them. Physical changes, peer pressure, grades, preparing for college, and more. Coping with all of these pressures can wreak havoc on teen self esteem, especially if one area or another is not going well. Teenage girls seem to be at a substantially higher risk than teenage boys for low self esteem. Why?
All teens have pressure. However, teen self esteem seems to run particularly low in girls. A lot of this has to do with the way teenage girls view themselves. With the physical changes the teenage years bring, girls are trying to fit into their image of being a woman. The media's constant influx of super thin, tall, acne free, beautiful models is an impossible roll for the majority of teenage girls to fit into.
The fact that printed media is air brushed to perfection also adds to this problem. Add to this the peer pressure to date, and the internal pressure of trying to figure out how to deal with boys as boyfriends can be overwhelming. Even if they get good grades, have friends and do everything right, sometimes they just do not have a boyfriend and that can rock their world. As adults we would love to teach our girls that their happiness should not be dependent on any man (or boy).
How do we improve teen self esteem?
First, never compare them to anyone else. If they are doing well in school, socially, or where ever, let them know that you acknowledge how well they are doing. Keep communication open. Problems with boys, no matter how minor we perceive them to be, are huge issues to a teenage girl. If an unkind remark was said, the hurt is very real. Let your teenage daughter know that you understand because you have been there. Tell her that you are there to help. Also, get her involved in things that make her feel good about herself. Instill as sense of "girl power" in her.
Teen self esteem is a delicate thing. Keeping it positive is a challenge because they have so many life changes going on without a lot of experience to deal with these changes. The best things we can do as parents of teens is to try to instill in then a sense of self worth that is firmly rooted in who they are, not in how they look at the moment.
All teens have pressure. However, teen self esteem seems to run particularly low in girls. A lot of this has to do with the way teenage girls view themselves. With the physical changes the teenage years bring, girls are trying to fit into their image of being a woman. The media's constant influx of super thin, tall, acne free, beautiful models is an impossible roll for the majority of teenage girls to fit into.
The fact that printed media is air brushed to perfection also adds to this problem. Add to this the peer pressure to date, and the internal pressure of trying to figure out how to deal with boys as boyfriends can be overwhelming. Even if they get good grades, have friends and do everything right, sometimes they just do not have a boyfriend and that can rock their world. As adults we would love to teach our girls that their happiness should not be dependent on any man (or boy).
How do we improve teen self esteem?
First, never compare them to anyone else. If they are doing well in school, socially, or where ever, let them know that you acknowledge how well they are doing. Keep communication open. Problems with boys, no matter how minor we perceive them to be, are huge issues to a teenage girl. If an unkind remark was said, the hurt is very real. Let your teenage daughter know that you understand because you have been there. Tell her that you are there to help. Also, get her involved in things that make her feel good about herself. Instill as sense of "girl power" in her.
Teen self esteem is a delicate thing. Keeping it positive is a challenge because they have so many life changes going on without a lot of experience to deal with these changes. The best things we can do as parents of teens is to try to instill in then a sense of self worth that is firmly rooted in who they are, not in how they look at the moment.
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